Thread: Cowboys Accountability Log

Originally Posted by maxmuscle1

The woods part sounds great!! Yeah the lower calories is definitely a bitch! I love to bulk up and cut down and it isn’t about the clean food part; it’s about the- I want more on my plate! Lol

Max

It doesn’t even get easier lol... like, my stomach has shrunk no doubt. I get full on less. But my body has a hissy fit every damn day. The only thing saving my ass is how slammed my days have been. It is brutal though. Its been interesting to watch my body fluctuate though. For no damn good reasons. Water retention one day, veiny and poppy the next... full and tight, then flat and flabby lmao... its like watching my body move fat around to protect it or something. Love handles disappearing one day, flipping over pants on my back side the next.. my legs though, are showing me it’s all figuring itself out. My upper body is starting to fall in line. My abs are fighting the good fight to stay only showing 4... but I’m inching down I can see it. I’ve definitely lost size too though but I’m not truly very worried at this point. I’m sticking to the plan.

My little side biz has taken off pretty well so far. It’s keeping me busy af after work. I almost wonder if maybe I need to start forcing my day job back to 8 hour days and give myself more time to run the other stuff..

Hope everyone’s hanging in there. Just checking in to say I’m alive. The ex moving out countdown has begun. I can’t wait to have my life back. And move on with healing and moving on. Its been a mo-effin mess to say the least. Ill never let a girl move in again ever. Everything’s hard AF to deal with already... but to re-live it every effin day, until someone finally splits, its hard on the spirit man.

Anyway hope the weekend has treated you well!

Originally Posted by Cowboymike

It doesn’t even get easier lol... like, my stomach has shrunk no doubt. I get full on less. But my body has a hissy fit every damn day. The only thing saving my ass is how slammed my days have been. It is brutal though. Its been interesting to watch my body fluctuate though. For no damn good reasons. Water retention one day, veiny and poppy the next... full and tight, then flat and flabby lmao... its like watching my body move fat around to protect it or something. Love handles disappearing one day, flipping over pants on my back side the next.. my legs though, are showing me it’s all figuring itself out. My upper body is starting to fall in line. My abs are fighting the good fight to stay only showing 4... but I’m inching down I can see it. I’ve definitely lost size too though but I’m not truly very worried at this point. I’m sticking to the plan.

My little side biz has taken off pretty well so far. It’s keeping me busy af after work. I almost wonder if maybe I need to start forcing my day job back to 8 hour days and give myself more time to run the other stuff..

Hope everyone’s hanging in there. Just checking in to say I’m alive. The ex moving out countdown has begun. I can’t wait to have my life back. And move on with healing and moving on. Its been a mo-effin mess to say the least. Ill never let a girl move in again ever. Everything’s hard AF to deal with already... but to re-live it every effin day, until someone finally splits, its hard on the spirit man.

Anyway hope the weekend has treated you well!

You will stick it out. You are a regimented man. With all that is going on with the acute body changes are all related to your health, outside stress factors, meds/supps. Once the girlfriend stuff subsides, you will see everything clearer mentally and physically. I personally can only tolerate letting myself get to a point and I have literally, gave everything to an ex, cut communication completely just to relieve myself of one more word or scenario that was riddling me hourly, minutely. It was the best decision I made and I gave up a lot financially when there was no need to. Still would do it today. I pray for you to be peaceful and satisfied. I know you have gratitude for so many other things but certain things are cancerous
and spread to other areas. Stay in touch and let’s rock the rest of 2020/2021!!

Max

Originally Posted by maxmuscle1

You will stick it out. You are a regimented man. With all that is going on with the acute body changes are all related to your health, outside stress factors, meds/supps. Once the girlfriend stuff subsides, you will see everything clearer mentally and physically. I personally can only tolerate letting myself get to a point and I have literally, gave everything to an ex, cut communication completely just to relieve myself of one more word or scenario that was riddling me hourly, minutely. It was the best decision I made and I gave up a lot financially when there was no need to. Still would do it today. I pray for you to be peaceful and satisfied. I know you have gratitude for so many other things but certain things are cancerous
and spread to other areas. Stay in touch and let’s rock the rest of 2020/2021!!

Max

Brother this year is taking shape to be a very good year if approached strategically and methodically... I have had to do some serious reining in my inner instant gratification guy and enter into a chess game and ditch the checkers.

Everything you said above is right on the money. Same exact actions for the outcomes...

But soon it’ll be done and I can get busy with everything else. So much stuff to be grateful for and had all this not gone south the way it had I would’ve never ended up on the path that I’m currently on heading towards exciting things ;0)

Oh! The Xyrim... I can’t hang brother lol.. my biggest issue with it is simply I will not have a baby sitter once my ex leaves. Apparently there’s a Xyrim cowboy who comes out to play and I have zero recollection of any of it. I was compared to an old drunk man with a 6 year old sense of humor.. I feel like I sleep well, the body automatically wakes up at 4 hours after first dose and I take the second.. then 4 hours my body automatically wakes up again... so I think I go to sleep but it seems I turn into a child who fights going to sleep for 4 hours instead... but then I think I’m waking up, when I’m actually just coming to... some nights after the second dose I go downstairs and she finds me sleeping standing up in front of the pantry. until I hear her and start shuffling around the cupboards as if I’ve been doing it all along... this didn’t happen until a few days into first week of max dose x’s 2 a night.... :0( I’m on last bottle of the last refill and my doc said to drop it to once before bed only until gone... He wants me back on the modafinil but I’ve about had my fill of chemicals for now I think.. my body feels like it needs some rest.

The program, I’m still nailing it. I’ve learned a lot about homemade pulley systems dos and donts though lol there’s obvious changes going on. I’m fascinated how quickly things change over something as simple as a meal.

Originally Posted by Cowboymike

Brother this year is taking shape to be a very good year if approached strategically and methodically... I have had to do some serious reining in my inner instant gratification guy and enter into a chess game and ditch the checkers.

Everything you said above is right on the money. Same exact actions for the outcomes...

But soon it’ll be done and I can get busy with everything else. So much stuff to be grateful for and had all this not gone south the way it had I would’ve never ended up on the path that I’m currently on heading towards exciting things ;0)

Oh! The Xyrim... I can’t hang brother lol.. my biggest issue with it is simply I will not have a baby sitter once my ex leaves. Apparently there’s a Xyrim cowboy who comes out to play and I have zero recollection of any of it. I was compared to an old drunk man with a 6 year old sense of humor.. I feel like I sleep well, the body automatically wakes up at 4 hours after first dose and I take the second.. then 4 hours my body automatically wakes up again... so I think I go to sleep but it seems I turn into a child who fights going to sleep for 4 hours instead... but then I think I’m waking up, when I’m actually just coming to... some nights after the second dose I go downstairs and she finds me sleeping standing up in front of the pantry. until I hear her and start shuffling around the cupboards as if I’ve been doing it all along... this didn’t happen until a few days into first week of max dose x’s 2 a night.... :0( I’m on last bottle of the last refill and my doc said to drop it to once before bed only until gone... He wants me back on the modafinil but I’ve about had my fill of chemicals for now I think.. my body feels like it needs some rest.

The program, I’m still nailing it. I’ve learned a lot about homemade pulley systems dos and donts though lol there’s obvious changes going on. I’m fascinated how quickly things change over something as simple as a meal.

Well it looks like you at least found a clear path and now your experiments are done with trying every avenue for the narcolepsy and you can get back to a regular course of action and start reaching your target goals. Glad you at least were able to try so you don’t have any boxes unchecked, it is hard to deal with but, the inner warrior will not stop! Glad to hear from you my friend. Let’s make the best out of this lemon of a year! Lemonade 2021 w a hydration pack! Lol

Max

Originally Posted by maxmuscle1

Well it looks like you at least found a clear path and now your experiments are done with trying every avenue for the narcolepsy and you can get back to a regular course of action and start reaching your target goals. Glad you at least were able to try so you don’t have any boxes unchecked, it is hard to deal with but, the inner warrior will not stop! Glad to hear from you my friend. Let’s make the best out of this lemon of a year! Lemonade 2021 w a hydration pack! Lol

Max

Now that’s a plan my brother

Mentally back in the saddle again. Good lawdy I honestly felt like demons were being exorcisted out of my body... I will not be doing that again... I have been giving the microdosing a shot now. So far all is going good. I have not noticed a lot other than the brain fog has vanished, thoughts feel more clear (could just be the meds clearing out though) I do still experience some anxiety but I’m kind of giving that some time as I believe I’m still clearing out the meds strongholds. But this week is final countdown. The ex moves out finally for good Saturday. Then that process can begin. I’ll never do that again either. Separate living quarters for life.

I have been really good about working out and I have allowed 200 more calories into the diet. Mainly because I honestly feel like I’m going to die Work has been insane. Just hot, high up, physical non stop and now dealing with the stresses of apprentices and job sites again... kind of hoping covid swoops in and makes it so I can work solo again for a while longer.

My little side biz of weights n plates has been fun. Exhausting as well though. It’s work on top of work. Plus my working out and dealing with home life... so I have a little lull currently as new inventory won’t be here until end of July... which sucks because the gyms forcing people to wear masks should be driving people to look for more opportunities to build home gyms. So hopefully I can still get in on the action. No one can beat my prices anyway. Except Walmart’s shit CAP brand dumbbells lol

Our parks will be opening up finally. I’m itching to get out into the forest. Amanitas are calling my name! Lol

Hope everyone’s doing well. I’m excited my time will open up since I won’t have to hide out in the garage working out, doing stuff or selling stuff or otherwise avoiding going inside until bedtime. ;0) I need to reconnect with my brothers and read up on how everyone’s been!

Life’s a trip my brothers. I’m just checking in, I’m not dead I promise ;0) But I have gone through some shit for sure... been doc prescribed med free. Microdosing has replaced those. Doing good regarding the break up. All healed from an accident I got into and totaled the work truck. Been hitting iron the whole time, diets been about 92% on point.

My heads right, been meditating, surfing and doing online mycology classes. My spirit feels energized and whole once again. I look forward to waking up AND to go to sleep.

Miss the fuck out of everyone here. I will be scaling back commitments to free up some of my time. I made it pretty hectic to stay distracted through the breakup lol. I’m no rookie. I know how to skate by that shit ;0)

Hope all is well, hoping to stop in more frequently. If even just to post here and there and comment. Catch up on some reading about what everyone’s been up to ;0)